


Vyvyan's Apology

by losercandy (pacificaxe)



Category: The Young Ones (TV 1982)
Genre: Humor, M/M, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-03
Updated: 2014-03-03
Packaged: 2018-01-11 03:52:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1168345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pacificaxe/pseuds/losercandy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vyvyan apologizes for what may be the first time in his life, and he has entirely no idea how to do it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Vyvyan Apologizes

Rick laid in bed, curled up around the cardboard sign he was being made to wear. He huffed loudly and shifted, trying to get into a position where the sign was not painfully digging into his body. No such position existed. Even lying on his back, the rope Vyvyan had used to make the sign scratched into his neck. He wondered where Vyvyan had managed to find such a completely horrible piece of rope. Rick figured it was probably the most horrid piece of rope in the world, and no one had suffered quite like he had. Well, when it came to being forced to wear degrading signs to bed, that is... He thought maybe he could chance taking it off, but just as he started to slip the rope of his neck, Vyvyan appeared in his doorway. Rick quickly moved his hands under his blanket. 

"I'm not going to take it off, you can stop checking on me!" he whined. 

He waited for Vyvyan to threaten him, or at least hit him over the head with something, but Vyvyan was silent. Vyv slowly made his way a bit further into the room. Rick thought Vyvyan must have been planning something truly sinister, because he had never seen him take one gentle movement in his life. Vyvan closed the door and Rick lost his silhouette in the darkness of the room.  


"Where are you, bastard? What are you planning?!" Rick said, panicked.  


When Vyvyan finally spoke, his voice emanated from a spot so close to Rick's ear that Rick nearly jumped ten feet out of the bed.  


"I'm not planning anything!" Vyv said, his voice defensive.  


"Well, what the hell are you doing then?" Rick asked, tugging at the sign around his neck, which had quite shifted in the commotion.  


"Take that thing off." Vyvyan demanded.  


"What?"  


"Take the sign off, you don't have to wear it." Vyvyan said, crouching and propping his arms on the bed.  


"Have you gotten the tee shirt made already? I didn't know you could do it that fas-"  


"Shut up, prick. There's no tee shirt, you just don't have to wear the sign, okay?"  


"I- don't understand..."  


"I just..." Vyv groaned loudly and punched himself in the temple. "I came up here to say I'm sorry... For all the virgin stuff, you know..."  


Rick blinked up, eyes adjusting to the darkness, and stared in utter disbelief. This was a trick, and he wasn't falling for it.  


"Why the hell are you apologizing? You've never apologized to me before!"  


Vyvyan grunted, huffed, and punched himself so hard that he launched onto the floor. He sat up, straightening his posture and huffing. 

"Mike had a talk with me and I realized what I did was uncalled for and I was being a bastard to you and obviously upset you very much..." He recited in a very rehearsed manner. He took a deep breath and gritted his teeth. "... _which was not my intention._ "  


The apology was an obvious lie, but Rick was enjoying it. He had the upper hand. "Oh, Mike 'had a talk' with you, did he? Is Mike your dad now or something?" Rick mocked, sitting up.  


Vyvyan glared at the stupid expression on Rick's face. Though, come to think of it, all of his facial expressions were stupid. He was extremely tempted to smack the face right off of the smug little priss. 

"He only had a talk with me because we all heard you crying, you poof!"  


Rick sat bolt upright on the bed.  
"DID NOT!" he shouted, feeling very close to tears again. "I mean... I WASN'T!"  


Vyvyan stared at Rick. He looked so stupid and girly and...lost. He looked scared, even. Vyv mentally berated himself. This was his first apology, but he was pretty sure this wasn't how they were supposed to go. Still, he was overwhelmed by the desire to smash Rick over the head with something. But, it was like Mike said, hitting people is not a good way to get them to stop crying...  


"I didn't mean to get you all worked up again... If I had known you were going to lay in bed crying and feeling sorry for yourself, I wouldn't have done it, alright? I was just takin' the piss, like always..."  
Vyvyan sat down on the edge of Rick's bed, even though he expected Rick to immediately try to shove him off.  
Rick looked at Vyvyan in shock. This time he sounded like he was actually trying to apologize. Sure, he sounded extremely anguished and frustrated, but wasn't that what guilt did to people? Rick wasn't sure... Maybe it wasn't guilt. Maybe it was something else... He barely noticed that Vyvyan was still talking. "...I mean, sure, you are usually girlie and over-emotional, but you know, I always just sort of thought that was how we got along, you annoy the vomit out of me, then I hit you over the head with a chair, then you-" Vyvyan was cut off mid-sentence by something hitting him in the face. It took a few seconds of haze before he realized that it was Rick's face. Vyvyan pulled back sharply.  


"What the hell are you doing?!" Rick looked _really_ scared now. You could practically hear his heart beating.  


"Oh, I- I just..." Rick's bulging eyes scanned the room. Hoping, praying, for something, anything, happen. How the hell was he supposed to explain this away? "No, I’m sorry! It's just I mean..."  


"What?" Vyvyan demanded.  


"You... you...." Rick thought about being honest for a moment... He quickly pushed that thought away. "You're the one coming onto _me!_ " He blurted. Vyvyan looked up at him.  


 _This is it._ Vyvyan thought. _These are the moments when you're allowed to punch someone._ Vyvyan reeled back, fist clenched. Rick didn't flinch or recoil or back away. He just sat there, looking sad and waiting, like he thought he deserved to get punched, too.  


 _Dammit._ Thought Vyvyan. The last thing he'd wanted was to feel sorry for the stupid git. Vyv sighed and unclenched his fist. "I was not! I was just trying to be decent. if you can't tell the difference, there's somthing seriously wrong with you!"  


Rick just kept staring. It was making Vyvyan very uncomfortable. Rick was overcome with the urge to tell the truth again. It was a foreign sensation to him. It felt a bit like nausea. "I can't tell the difference because no one's ever bothered to do either to me."  
From the look on Vyvyan's face, Rick couldn't tell if he'd actually said it, or if they were still sitting there in uncomfortable silence. The quiet in the room was ringing in his ears. His face felt hot. No, he must have said it, then. Would he be this embarrassed if he hadn't said it?  
Vyvyan was reeling. He felt so...so... He wasn't sure. Sorry for Rick? Honestly? He would have thought hell would freeze over before that happened.


	2. Hell Freezes Over

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Satan is not having his day.

"Zero degrees Celsius?!" Satan bellowed, angrily thumping the thermostat. Several of the souls who should have been tortured by flames with no interruptions for at least another hundred years were all cooing in relief and rejoicing. "God hasn't forgotten us!" one of them yelled, gleefully.

"Shut it, Virgil!" a nearby daemon called, thumping him on the head. Virgil whimpered. "He hit me!" he yelled, pointing at the daemon. Satan would have glared at him, but he was too busy shivering. 

"Sod it, it's nearly impossible to torture anyone in such desolate conditions." Satan mumbled to himself. 

"What is it? Why has everything gone all wonky?!" The daemon asked. Satan looked sadly at him. 

"Someone on earth must be about to do something wildly out of character..."


	3. Chapter 3

Vyvyan would be lying if he said he hadn't thought about it once or twice. After all, Rick's mouth was MUCH bigger than SPG's. His teeth weren't as sharp either.  


“Fine.” Vyvyan sighed, leaning in to kiss Rick. Rick snapped his head back in surprise as Vyvyan leaned toward him.  


“Calm down, bug eyes! I’m not going to hurt you.”  


Rick settled a bit and braced himself. He looked a bit uneasy, but he closed his eyes and leaned toward Vyvyan anyway.  
Kissing Vyvyan was quite nice, if you could get past the nose ring. Not that Rick had anything to compare it to, but he was enjoying himself a bit. Vyvyan stared out very tentative, but soon enough his personality was showing through. He got a bit more exploratory, using his tongue, sucking on Rick’s lip. Rick wasn't sure exactly what to do with himself, and made awkward attempts to become a more active kissing partner. He started to wonder how other people could manage to snog very long, because he was having trouble breathing. He pulled his mouth away from Vyvyan, and gulped down air.  
Vyvyan didn’t stop kissing him, though, he merely moved down to his jaw and neck. Rick tried not to shiver… He was getting embarrassed with how much he was enjoying himself. Vyvyan bit down gently on his neck. A soft moan escaped Rick’s mouth before he could stop it. He tensed up. Vyvyan was laughing.  


"I- I- I…” Rick stammered.  


Vyvyan kept laughing aginst his neck. “It’s nothing I haven’t heard before.”  


“W-what do you mean?”  


“I hear you... wanking... all the time, Rick.” Vyvyan said between kisses.  


If Rick wasn’t flustered before, he certainly was now. 

“Wh-how- DO NOT.” He protested.  


“Do too! I hear all your girly little moans!” Vyvyan moved his mouth closer to Rick’s ear. “Don’t worry though; your poofy little moans are cute.” Vyvyan whispered, just to fluster Rick further.  


“You’re calling _me_ a poof?”  


“Shut up, Prick.”  


Vyvyan slammed back into Rick’s lips to ensure that he did, in fact, shut up. Rick was starting to sort of get the hang of this whole snogging thing. It was messy, sure, but it was much more enjoyable after he realized he could breathe out of his nose a bit and put his hands on Vyvyan. He wrapped his arms around Vyvyan’s neck, which prompted Vyvyan to grab him by the waist. Vyvyan got on his knees and crawled forward a bit, pushing himself even closer to Rick. Rick tried to scoot his body away a bit, not wanting Vyvyan to notice that he was…well… 

"Oh my god, have you got a hard-on for me?" Vyvyan said, much too loudly for Rick's comfort. If they heard him crying earlier _surely_ they heard Vyvyan now. 

"Shut UP, Vyvyan!" he hissed.  


Vyvyan squared up with Rick's face and looked him dead in the eyes. 

"I'm going to do you a favour." 

Vyvyan hands found their way to Rick's trousers, and started to unbutton them. He caught Rick's eyes, waiting for the okay to continue. Rick thought the decent thing to do would probably be to seem a bit hesitant. He didn't want to look too eager. But then again, if he put up any sort of protest, Vyvyan might stop, and he certainly didn't want that. Rick did a weird sort of awkward half-nod/half-bob thing. Vyyan almost made fun of him, but made a mental note save it for later. Vyvyan unzipped Rick's trousers and was busy working them off of him. 

"I _hate_ these things!" Vyvyan grunted as he struggled with Rick's slacks. Rick wasn't exactly helping him, either. He seemed more content to sit there, looking dumb and breathing heavier with every second. "Why do you wear these to bed anyway?!" Vyvyan stage whispered angrily, as he finally got them over Rick's knees and let them drop to the floor.

"I don't usually." Rick said, matter-of-fact-ly. "Anyway, you're one to talk! You sleep in Doc Marten's every night!" 

"Rick, shut up." Vyvyan said, sliding his fingers around the waist band of Rick's y-fronts. Rick did, indeed, shut up.

**Author's Note:**

> (HEY GUYS! Welcome to my first [published] fic! Consider the classic, I don't own any of these characters or anything like that, capice? )


End file.
